Good and bad behavior is different for different people. What you may consider to be a bad behavior may seem normal to other parents and vice versa. Circumstances also create behavior problems in children. For example if you have had a fight at your workplace before coming home, and have a demanding child who is insisting to fulfill his demands ‘right now’, you may find it hard to cope up with your child’s state of disorder or indiscipline. Parents react in several different ways to their child’s behavior. While some are patient and deal with such outbursts patiently, some may impose stricter rules and give punishments. Your child’s overall character is also a determining factor to his reaction. Some children react by being noisy, while some will simply withdraw and sulk.
What are the possible reasons of behavior problems in children?
There are many reasons for difficult behavior in children. Let’s take a look at some of these…
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Is there a change in your child’s life? Have you moved to a new house? Have you had a new baby? Have you changed his or her school or have you started her with a playgroup? Consider these questions and perhaps you will come out with a feasible solution.
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Children are quick to notice any problems in the family or if you are upset with something. It is possible that they also exhibit bad behavior due to these problems, and you may find it very difficult to cope. Whatever is the case, never blame your children if they react with bad behavior.
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Giving in to tantrums is not correct. Behavior problems in children usually start with this, as they feel that a tantrum is a great way of getting attention. This holds true even if you pay bad attention. So give them more attention when they are behaving nicely and less when they are showing bad behavior.
Common behavior problems in children
There is a range of behavioral disorders that are caused amongst children due to several factors. Some of these factors are disturbed marital life, family issues, abuse and neglect, overindulgence, chronic illness or separation. So the child’s problems may result from a variety of factors, and the way they are expressed is influenced by many reasons like his or her developmental stage, coping ability, temper and the nature of stress. Usually it is easier to deal with out-of-the-way behavior problems than with prolonged behavior problems.
Young children tend to exhibit impaired physiological functions like having a disturbed sleep. Older children may have relationship issues with their friends or family. They may have poor performance at school or they may develop phobias. Proper intervention is required to judge the actual behavior problems in children. Here are a few problems that should raise your concern.
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Thumb sucking – Though this comfort behavior is pretty normal in infancy, if continued in adolescent stage, it has to be ignored by parents. At the same time parents need to reinforce and provide assurance to other activities of their child.
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Stuttering – This problem arises in 5% of the children when they learn to speak. While 20% of these retain it even in their adulthood, rest start speaking normally. This problem may arise if you ask your child to do something that is against his or her nature. For example if you force your child to write with his right hand while he writes with his left hand naturally, he may develop a stutter.
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Tics – When your child suffers from emotional or physical distress, you may notice tics. Tics are repetitive muscular movements that aid in reducing tension. It usually involves head, neck and hands. Parental pressure increases tics. It is best to ignore tics in order to reduce their occurrence.
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Anxiety disorder – Even though anxiety is a part of developmental process, its persistence in the adulthood can be a precursor to reduced social behavior. Intervention is required if your child develops socially disabling conditions.
How to successfully deal with behavior problems in children?
Remember that children want to please their parents. It may seem that your child wants to drive you crazy, but in reality, they love you a lot and want to please you more often than you think. Keep this in mind when you are trying to discipline them.
Don’t make mountains out of a molehill. For example going to a friend’s party without informing is a mountain, the color of his new shirt is a molehill. Sadly many parents make mountains of things that should have been molehills. Dealing with behavior problems in children this way makes life tedious and exhausting.
Defining how to deal with behavior problems will guide you which battle you should fight with your kids and which should be left.
